I’ve been pretty happy in my blissful bubble as of late. Surrounding myself with people whose diverse interests mirror my own to some degree, and who I think are basically “good people.” Unfortunately, the bubble is starting to deflate.
Problem is, for everyone who thinks that someone or something is great – there’s always someone else who is vehemently opposed to it. And apparently some people are just too damn ignorant, closed minded, and self-absorbed to be ok with the parts of me that they disagree with – so they discard the acquaintance/friendship/relationship as a whole.
NEWSFLASH PEOPLE – WE’RE NOT ALL THE SAME, AND THAT’S WHAT MAKES US INTERESTING AND UNIQUE.
Apparently the things I eat, places I go, people I see, and leisure activities I choose to pursue are all unacceptable in the eyes of those I know, in some way or another.
And I love how this manifests itself into many my “friends” and acquaintances always assuming the worst about me – despite the fact that they’ve only ever bothered to see the tip of the iceburg that is the “real me.”
When I ask someone if they’re going to the same party that someone they dislike might be attending, I’m two-faced – regardless of whether or not I was just curious, and the other person simply asked me if I knew, and I responded.
And when it comes to the places I choose to purchase my food and what I choose to feed my body – I’m an elitist snob.
Oh, and when I go out to celebrate a part of my personality that some may call deviant, I’m just a freak, and will certainly turn into a monster that’s no good and whom nobody can respect.
And because I don’t spill my guts about all of my personal problems – but try to extend a sympatetic remark and some encouragement to someone who doesn’t know the extent of what I’ve been through in the past (because really, it’s none of their damn business) I’m nothing but an ignorant, arrogant meddler.
Bottom line is, I’m me. You don’t have to agree with everything I do, but at least respect that I have my views, and you have yours, and it’s actually pretty easy to get off your high horse and agree to disagree with friends.
And if you’re offended by that – think about the fact that it’s the same intolerant attitudes, and a blatent opposition to living with and embracing diversity that resulted in the beating death of an innocent boy this weekend. You don’t have to beat me with your sticks. Your words and attitudes hurt enough.
And if you think I’m talking about you, I am. So there.
peechie, I don’t know you super-well, but everytime I see you I’m reminded of the ways in which you and I inherently disagree. We have completely, stunningly different views about.. well I won’t even get into it. The point is that each time I also come away thinking exactly this thought:
It’s amazing how someone can be friends with another even when they probably wouldn’t see eye to eye on many issues.
So far, I’m okay with both the parts I agree with and the parts that I don’t agree with. =)
Well, I like you doooood
As an impartial observer…the personality that comes across from the writing in your blog seems snotty, bitchy and flippant most of the time. But sometimes you seem decent and caring. (Whatever. I don’t know you so I don’t care.)
wow.. that was long.
lets go for a beer!@
Well then.
“A SERMON ON ETHICS AND LOVE
One day Mal-2 asked the messenger spirit Saint Gulik to approach the Goddess and request Her presence for some desperate advice. Shortly afterwards the radio came on by itself, and an ethereal female Voice said YES?
“O! Eris! Blessed Mother of Man! Queen of Chaos! Daughter of Discord! Concubine of Confusion! O! Exquisite Lady, I beseech You to lift a heavy burden from my heart!”
WHAT BOTHERS YOU, MAL? YOU DON’T SOUND WELL.
“I am filled with fear and tormented with terrible visions of pain. Everywhere people are hurting one another, the planet is rampant with injustices, whole societies plunder groups of their own people, mothers imprison sons, children perish while brothers war. O, woe.”
WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH THAT, IF IT IS WHAT YOU WANT TO DO?
“But nobody Wants it! Everybody hates it.”
OH. WELL, THEN STOP.
At which moment She turned herself into an aspirin commercial and left The Polyfather stranded alone with his species.
SINISTER DEXTER HAS A BROKEN SPIROMETER.”
Hey, whatdya know, some of that DOES apply to me. 🙂 Of course, I’ve previously explained my stance on the particular point that applies to me, so I won’t rehash that over again.
That said, I can’t speak for anyone else, but simply disagreeing with something someone says/believes/does won’t usually cause me to write them off as a friend all together (unless it’s one of those “dealbreaker” things, like … I don’t know, raping babies.) Hell, I’ve got friends who are hardcore christians, despite my severe dislike of organized religion… republicans, despite my severe dislike of George Bush… and vegetarians, despite my severe dislike of eating healthy. 🙂
Of course, I’ve been called an anomoly before, so I have no idea how much of what I say applies to anyone else. But I’d like to think that for the most part, people are pretty good at agreeing to disagree. Like d says, there are exceptions — some things are just … too much. Like raping babies. 🙂
However, last I checked, babies were still pretty safe around you. And so I still like you. 🙂
Not that i suspect it matters for anything. I don’t necessarily agree with everything that you say, but for years i’ve liked *how* you say the things that you say. That matters to me, and that’s why i find myself daily coming to your blog, hoping that you’ve written something new. I don’t care if you write about your inner most feelings, or talk about the colour of your socks. I’m quite content with the aspects of yourself that you do show.
I don’t feel that i need to agree with you about anything. I think if you enjoy a person then that’s all that matters, no matter what level you enjoy them on. *I’m* glad that you’re not just another clone. You *ARE* unique, and i like it.
Hmph.
If someone you know can’t listen to what you have to say without jumping down your throat at every breath, they shouldn’t be your friend. It’s ok to disagree, but agree to disagree, and show some respect. That’s the only way any type of relationship can work. It’s not about what’s right, but what’s right for you. And not everybody can/will understand that.
There are a lot more people out there worth being friends with. I hope both you and whoever you’re talking about know that 🙂
all i can say is AMEN sister.
sometimes it’s just too hard to remain friends with someone whose views are *that* different than mine.