You can’t imagine how unbelievably sad I am to be writing this entry.
Ending any relationship is hard, but this one meant more to me than most. It’s seen me through so much, been with me through good times and bad, and its warm, comforting embrace has been the one constant I’ve had to rely on when nothing else was going right.
My friends, I am off coffee.
I’ve been pretty ill for quite some time. Since late March I’ve been dealing with being completely irregular (varying widely from one end of that particular spectrum to the other), and random attacks of nausea. It’s gotten to bad that I’ve had to walk out on dinners (because just being in the presence of food is enough to trigger illness) and have bolted from a cab, upstairs to the bathroom just in time to hurl. I have spent more nights than I care to admit to myself curled up in the fetal position waiting for the sweet release of sleep – or death – or anything to make me stop feeling like my torso is being turned inside-out.
Now I’m at a point where I don’t like going out much, because I have no idea how I’ll feel or what might happen (it tends to come out of “nowhere”). I’ve lost 5lbs – but not in a good way. I’ve actually mostly abandoned any sort of serious exercise routine, because on a daily basis I’m never sure if I’ll be able to consume enough calories to make it through a workout without fainting. And of course, the lack of exercise means my energy levels have gone waaaaaay down, and I’m mostly tired all the time.
It was clearly time to do something about this, and I’m already familiar with the processes of dealing with GI distresses – so I started paying really close attention to everything I do and eat.
And one constant I’ve found is coffee.
I’ve not had any for a few days (or the couple cups I have had made me pretty sick) – and I’m already starting to feel better.
I almost wish I didn’t.
But for now, coffee is dead to me. Really rich foods (especially dense, dark chocolates) and wine are on notice.
Of course, if I actually have to move either one of those to the banned list, life may not be worth living anymore.
At the moment, though, things are slowly getting better – and Neil has switched from delivering java in the mornings to tea instead.
Maybe you’re pregnant.
🙂
This happened to me too, a few years ago. I was sick for months before I figured it out. I didn’t drink coffee for a long time and now stick to lattes (it seems the milk makes it easier on my stomach).
This year I started drinking coffee now and again but immediately started having gastro issues from it. I can sort of get away with it if drinking it with a big meal, but I never seem to want to have coffee with food.
I hope you sort the stomach troubles. I’ve had bad periods now and again for a few years, but recently found out that it’s pretty much 90% stress-related, 10% food-related. So as you try to figure things out, look at it from various angles, you never know.
OMG I had no idea you were feeling that sick all of the time! That totally blows! You’re a pretty tough cookie to keep up as much activity as you have been.
*hugs* hopefully you won’t have to give up on the wine. But if you do, I promise I won’t drink in front of you. And we can change that idea for the thing I was telling you and Neil about, to something not involving wine.
You might try getting a blood test for Celiac disease (basically a gleuten intolerance). My mom has it, and she’s been told it commonly flares up in the late 20’s early 30’s. Just a thought.
Maybe it’s the kind of coffee you’re drinking? I loves my timmies’ and treats me right. However, if I drink the swill from across the road here (Shitty deli that serves “Van Houtte”,) the end result is not pretty.
I don’t know how I’d deal with mornings, sans cafe.
You’re a stronger person than I am if you get through this.
Oh yeah, hi!
-C.